Misunderstood Black Bird
by XxflawedrainbowxX
Summary: She feels that no one would ever understand what she was going through. Boy was she wrong! Little did she know there was a certain green changeling that knew exactly what she was going through. R&R please! I don't own the titans!
1. Chapter 1

_**So this is my first ever BB+Rae fanfic ever! YAY! (other than that one shot i did) I am a HUGE bb and rae fan, the two were meant for eachother! so...anyway, i will definitely try and update asap; this is no one shot! it's something that came in my head and i just HAD to write it down. please, PLEASE review and critique! you have no idea how much it means to me! enjoy;)**_

_She was reading her book again. That same old book. It had to have been her favorite or something because I was certain she'd finished it loads of times._

_She didn't even notice me staring at her. Oh, how beautiful she was when she read. How she tucked that violet hair behind her ear when it fell and tickled her gorgeous face. How she turned the page so gracefully and chuckled to herself at something funny in her book. It was something I'd taken liking to after I realized what I'd been denying since I first laid eyes on her._

_I love her._

_I love everything about that girl, the one who has never laughed at any of my jokes, the one who despises all video games, the one that remains locked in her room for days without coming out. The half demon daughter of Trigon the Terrible, Raven._

_I know it's pathetic of me to write these things down when I should tell her, but I just can't! I mean let's be realistic. What could she ever see in some green, obnoxious vegetarian like myself? Besides, I don't deserve her. In fact I don't think there is a single man on the planet that deserves her._

_But more than anything, I want her to be happy, and she seems quite fine on her own. She'd never feel the same towards me. Not even if her life depended on it. Gotta go, Starfire is calling me._

_Garfield Logan_

"Friend Beast Boy, Robin and Cyborg await your arrival to give your butt the whooping on the video games! Will you please join us and perhaps convince friend Raven to come out of her room? I am beginning to become concerned for her because she has not come out in two days!"

"Sure Star," the green teen says. He knew that the only reason he'd agreed so easily was because of the excuse to talk to Raven.

"Glorious! I shall tell the others that you are coming." With that, the Tameranian left for the common room.

As Beast Boy made his way to the half demon's room, a thick metallic smell caught his attention. It grew as he approached closer to Raven's room. He also noticed the faint sound of music near.

When he reached the door he said, "Hey Rae, the others and I are getting pretty concerned that you haven't come out for two days now." No answer. "Raven?" Still no answer. "Okay, I'm going to come in now…" Nothing.

Beast Boy transformed into a mouse and slid under Raven's door. As he reverted to a human he could hear the music much more clearly and recognize it as _Flyleaf_.

Raven was sitting on her bed, unmoving, body turned away from the door. In her ears were small earphones and in her hand and ipod. Unaware of the changeling's presence, Raven sang quietly to herself.

_I'm so sick_

_Infected with_

_Where I live_

_Let me live without this_

_Empty bliss_

_Selfishness_

_I'm so sick_

…_I'm so sick_

To Beast Boy, her singing was absolutely wonderful. Who would have known she could be such an amazing singer?

Trying desperately not to startle her, he reached to tap her shoulder. She should have sensed him by now anyway, right?

"Hey, Raven-"

"WAHH!" she gasped dropping her ipod onto the floor.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to frighten you! I thought you sensed me!"

Focusing on catching her breath, she said, "I wasn't paying attention to you! I was listening to-"

"_Flyleaf_. I know them."

"…You know _Flyleaf_? Wait how did you know I was listening to them?"

"Sensitive hearing," he whispered bending down to pick up her ipod.

"Sensitive hearing?" she repeated taking note of his long, pointy ears.

"Yep, and I can smell things from quite a distance as well. Just a side effect of…being part animal I guess. Here," he muttered putting the ipod in her long pale fingers. She winced at his touch and snatched her hand back. "Um…sorry…" Beast Boy said eyeing Raven warily.

"…Don't touch me so much," she muttered turning her face away from him to reach for her ipod. She carefully pried it from his fingers, careful not to make any contact with his skin.

Deciding not to acknowledge what had just occurred, Beast Boy offered Raven to come down to the common room with the others.

"No."

"But Rae common, it'll be fun! Cy, Robin and I were going to play video games and you and Star could cheer me on!"

"No." Just as she thought the changeling had given up, he bent down and breathed into her face.

"Please?" he said placing a finger under her chin and tilting her head up so that their faces were inches apart. His lips were set in a delicate smile, and his beautiful green eyes were all Raven could think about. She couldn't breathe.

"Um…maybe…"

He batted his long eyelashes playfully and whispered again, "Please Rae?"

"…Fine."

"Woo hoo! The others will be glad to see you! I mean, you haven't been down for food in days-"

"SO? Maybe I wasn't hungry! Why are you all over my case?"

Bewildered he wondered if it was something he'd said. "Raven I…"

"Just get out!" she screeched her eyes beginning to glow white. The changeling knew it was time to leave.

With that, he stood and high tailed it out of there!

Raven sighed. She hadn't meant to be so defensive. She just didn't want anyone to realize her lack of eating. She couldn't let anyone figure out what she was going through right now! She had to take precautions and be more careful. Now she'd have to _fake_ her eating. Great. As if she'd needed to see that disgusting food again! Being around it would be horribly tempting.

The half demon glanced down at her wrist. Still bleeding. _He didn't even notice, _she thought.

The Titans could never know why. They would never understand. With that, she placed the earphones back in her ears and began to softly sing to herself again.

_You sink into my clothes..._

_This invasion makes me feel_

_Worthless hopeless sick…_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Second chappie. Thank you so much for the reviews! They really did warm my heart! I apologize for the wait. My dog got a disease so its been really hectic around the house lately:/ There was some cutting in the last chapter. And in this one. Please be warned that if you dont like "emo" dont read this! You'll find out eventually why she cuts...that is if you havent already figured out! Haahhaha. Enjoy;)**_

As much as I tell myself not to worry about her, it just won't pass through my skull. I know there's something wrong with her, I just knowit! Why she won't talk to anyone about it is definitely beyond me. If I only had the guts to knock on her door and demand her tell me what the hell her problem was! But something told me that just wasn't the way to handle this. I don't know why I can't just drop this. I mean, before when Raven kept to herself, I completely went along with it. Now I constantly want her to open up to me, to tell me everything that she keeps bottled up within her.

Yeah. Keep dreaming Garfield.

Ever since the night I mentioned Raven's lack of eating, she's been…well…not herself. In the kitchen, when we all eat together, or in the common room when we hang, it's like she _forces _herself to make small talk. It's terrible! It's almost like watching Starfire shove her horrible food down poor Silkie's throat, which by the way is a horrific sight.

Like just this morning we were having breakfast. Cy was preparing his usual crud: eggs, bacon, waffles…all that jazz. Raven had her kettle of water for herbal tea, and Star and Robin sat at the table conversing. My tofu had already been prepared, and I was having it with a couple of waffles.

"Hey Rae," I say out of courtesy.

"Beast Boy." She nods in my direction. I notice that she turns her torso in my direction. "How…is it…going?" her voice is cracking and she winces.

"You okay Rae?" I say in between bites of tofu.

"Didn't anyone ever tell you not to talk with your mouth full?" she murmurs. Notice how she disregarded my question completely! She always does that. She always ignores herself and her well being.

Writing about that gothic beauty gives me a headache. I'm gonna get an asprin.

Garfield Logan

After the green changeling finished his entry, he was off to the medical bay for an asprin. It was true that talking about his love was sometimes very tiring. She was such a complex person…but that was just one of the many qualities Beast Boy liked about her.

On his way back from the med bay, Beast Boy's ears picked up the faint sound of a whimper in the hallway where all of the bedrooms were. And then another. And another. _Maybe it was just Robin and Starfire in the same room again._ The changeling winced at the thought. Could they at least keep it down?

As he passed Robin's room, he noticed that the only sound coming from inside was snoring. Robin was asleep? Then what was that he'd heard?

Beast Boy checked Starfire's room to be sure, and when he heard slow breathing coming from within the bedroom he knew it meant that she was asleep as well. He could even hear Cy's charger running, probably refilling his battery after a long day.

The whimper caught his attention again. Raven!

"Raven? Rae are you okay in there? Hello?" On the other side of the door Beast Boy heard something clunk as though it had fallen to the floor. That sick metallic scent was back again, and this time it was even thicker.

"Raven, please answer me! Hello? Hello?"

"Go away Beast Boy! I'm fine!" The green teen knew that he was not the brightest person in the world, but anyone would have been able to tell that she had been crying!

"No you aren't! Let me in, or I'll break the door down!"

"You do that and I'll send you to another dimension!"

"You think I won't break this thing? I will Rae! Dimension or not, I KNOW there's something wrong with you! And you're going to tell me what the hell it is!"

Audacity was coursing through the Changeling's veins. Finally he'd had the guts to get Raven to spill everything! He wasn't going to back down until she did!

Much to his surprise, the door was surrounded in black aura, and it slid open. Raven stood with her body toward the changeling, face hidden by her hood. Her cloak surrounded every inch of skin around her besides the corners of her mouth, which were turned down forming a scowl.

"What do you want?" she whispered trying desperately to conceal every hint of sadness in her voice.

"What's wrong Raven? Please tell me."

"I'm fine."

"Don't play bullshit with me Raven. I know you're lying."

"…Nothing is wrong, Beast Boy…" her voice was about to give in and it began to crack.

"_Nothing_ is wrong? Or is-"

"Everything…is wrong…" she whispered as a tear rolled its way down her pale face.

"Raven…" the changeling whispered pulling her into an embrace.

"OWW!" she screeched and he immediately let her go.

"What, did I hurt you…?" Beast Boy stopped dead in his tracks when he realized what she was eyeing. He followed her amethyst eyes to observe a sticky crimson fluid that painted his shirt. "Rae, you didn't…" he whispered.

The half demon was gripping her left arm tightly with her right as if to try and stop the constant bleeding. Beast Boy's jade eyes grew, and his eye brows pulled down in rage.

"WHAT THE-"

"Shut up! Don't wake anyone up-"

"How could you DO that to yourself? Since when do you cut yourself Raven? Since when have you given in to _anything_? This isn't the answer! I know you're stronger-"

"Oh yeah, and what do you know about cutting? Nothing!"

"…You don't know what you're talking about," he said.

"Don't I?"

Scowling angrily at the beautiful girl, his love, in front of him, he shoved up his sleeves and said, "I was stupid Rae. I used to do that too." Unbelieving, she looked down in amazement completely stunned at what she saw. Both of the green teen's arms were covered in scars and whips!

"Now do you see? You can't do this…" he murmured pulling her to her bed to sit down.

"I…I'm so sorry Beast Boy," she sobbed. "I didn't want you to see me like this…"

"Tell me why you did it,"

"…"

"Rae, you can trust me with _anything_ and you know that. You do know that don't you?"

She thought for a moment then nodded. "Then tell me why," he said again.

"…I don't want to live anymore, Beast Boy,"

"What? What are you talking about? Why?"

"I was born to do horrible things…and…I've already handed the Earth over to my father on a silver platter…"

"You saved the whole planet in exchange. Every being on this planet owes you their life!"

"…I'm a cold hearted demon Beast Boy. Don't you know what that means? It means I don't give a damn about anyone in this universe!"

"But you _aren't _a demon Rae. Have you forgotten of your human side?"

"Of course I haven't forgotten. It's what haunts me so much…" she said, mindlessly healing her wounds.

_That must be how she hid the wounds, _he thought.

She glanced up at the changeling and said, "Yes, that is how I hid them. Feel the pain and then put it away until later."

"Sometimes I forget you can read minds," he chuckled. Without warning the changeling yanked her hood back and placed a hand on her soft, delicate cheek.

The two were sitting at a perfect angle; the moonlight hit her _perfectly_ causing him to sigh at her loveliness.

_God you're so beautiful Rae, _he thought. Oh shit. Had she heard that?

"Yes I heard you," she said. She was smiling. For the first time in so long, the corners of her lips were pulled upwards and the sight of it made him want to gasp in awe.

"Why don't you shudder at my touch?" she asked abruptly.

"What?"

"…Isn't my skin ice cold?"

"…I don't know. I can't…um…I don't _feel_ the way you do. Cold doesn't bother me, though heat is something entirely different."

"So…I feel normal to you?"

"Of course." He grinned.

"Beast Boy?"

"Yeah, Raven?"

"Thank you for being here." She whispered.

"You know I care about you Rae. You know that I will always be here."

"Beast Boy?"

"Hmm?"

"I know now." Then she sighed and he wrapped his arms tighter around her smallish figure pulling her even closer.


	3. Chapter 3

_**Hey guys again, i'm sorry for the wait. Honestly i've been pretty lazy around the house and have had plenty of time to write, but sometimes the ideas just dont hit me as quickly if you know what i mean. truthfully im making this story line up as i go, and as much as i want to change the plot completely you guys seem to like it the way it is! and i seriously love you for that! thank you so much for reviewing:) it makes my world! :D enjoy;)**_

_She smiles now. Such a beautiful smile. Every day she beams at me, her stunning amethyst orbs looking straight into my soul._

_I feel so close to her now. I feel like I can feel it when bobs up and down chuckling with laughter. Even the other Titans have noticed the change in her. I swear her eyes sparkle now, really they do._

_I didn't think it humanly possible for anyone to be so stunning! I wondered if maybe it was the demon blood within her that causes her to be so…her._

_She's so lively now! All I did was talk to her! She told me everything. She told me how she felt when that damned fool Malchior broke her heart. She told me how she sometimes cried in her sleep. She told me about the nightmares she had days before Trigon destroyed the earth._

_Every night I go to her room when the others are asleep, and we share secrets with each other. It's incredible but…I'm terrified. I'm terrified that this is all a dream, and that I'll wake up and everything will be normal again, with Raven remaining locked within the boundaries of her room for millenniums without ever coming out. I just want to enjoy this. Every day my love for her grows stronger and it's becoming too much to bare. I think that I should…that maybe I should tell someone._

_Wish me luck,_

_Garfield Logan_

Beast Boy sighed at the entry. Whom he would tell he had no idea. Loving Raven was something a man just _had _to get off of his chest! With that thought, the changeling sought off for a glass of soy milk.

Upon the roof she sighed. Cyborg commented on Raven's lack of eating, and in doing this, convinced her to have one of his famous pulled pork sandwiches. She refused at first, but the mouthwatering smell of barbeque was calling to her! So she ate. And ate. And ate. And _ate_. She hadn't meant to be greedy, but she was just so hungry that she felt her stomach was going to jump through her throat to reach the food if she didn't oblige. Cyborg assumed his cooking was superb and that she'd enjoyed it so much that she just wanted more and more.

She'd given in. Just when she thought she was doing fine, well damn Cyborg had to go and barbeque. Well that's alright. She wasn't going to give in again.

A knock at the Tameranian's door caused her to jump slightly then say, "Come in."

The changeling figured that telling the girl that felt like an older sister would be his best bet.

"Hey Star. Got a minute?"

"Of course friend Beast Boy. Do you require the assistance?"

"…Yeah. Something like that. See…I…well…I have a…_friend_ who…um…" Starfire had never seen Beast Boy struggle for words, so she urged for him to continue. "I have a _friend_ who likes Raven."

"Oh this is glorious friend! Raven has told me how she would enjoy the friend of boy some day!"

"You mean a boyfriend?"

"…?"

"Never mind. Um, well my _friend_ wants to know…how he should tell her."

"Perhaps you should tell this friend that Raven is quite fond of poetry and tea, so perhaps he could recite poetry for her and take her out for tea!"

"Star, that's brilliant! Thanks! Man I can't wait to tell-" The green teen stopped himself when he caught sight of the red head's smirk. She knew he was asking for advice simply for himself. Not even Starfire was that naive. "I'll be sure to tell my friend. Thanks Starfire." And with that, he slipped out of the room to speak with Robin.

_The sunset is so pretty, _Happiness sighed as Raven smiled at it.

"Yeah, it is…" she agreed aloud.

"What is?" a voice came from behind her.

She turned to find a half metal man looking down at her.

"The sunset."

"Sounded like you were talking to someone," he mused as he took a seat beside her.

"…I was speaking with my emotions."

"Ah," he mumbled. "Well they're right. It's a perfect sight."

"Mmm," she agreed. "What brings you up here?" she wondered.

"…I wanted to ask you something."

Wary now, she whispered, "What is it?"

"First things first. You have to swear you'll tell me the truth. And not just any swear. I'm trusting you as my little sis to gimme nothin' but the truth. Down?"

She sighed. "Fine. Deal."

"Okay. Well…noticed that you've been more lively lately. Experiencing things here and there, letting the chips fall where they may."

"Your point?"

"Today when I made you that sandwich…well I've never seen anyone devour _anything _that quickly Rae. Got me to thinking that maybe…" the sun was just about down now, and the sky was painted with violet and ebony. The moon shone brightly reflecting off of Cyborg's metal chest plate. Raven thought it looked beautiful, the way the light danced on his body. "That maybe you haven't been eating like a normal person should."

"…I have no idea what you're talking about. I'm absolutely fine."

"Beast Boy's the one that brought this to my attention kiddo. He asked me to make sure you ate the other day when he had to leave the tower. And ya didn't."

"…"

"Speechless, huh?"

"Cyborg…I…I can explain-" The alarm sounded interrupting her briefly.

_Thank Azar, _Raven thought.

"I don't think so kid. You're gonna tell me why you haven't been eating."

"But…the alarm-"

"What alarm?" he mused pushing a button on his arm turning the alarm off.

"Grr."

Cyborg chuckled and said, "I have access to the mainframe _and _the security system. Don't ya think I got the hook up?"

"Look the reason…you can't tell anyone alright? And I'm notanorexic or anything so don't go around thinking that. I eat…Just not often. Anyway…the reason is cause-"

"Cyborg," the throaty voice of their leader brought them from their conversation. They both turned their attention to the monitor screen on his arm and sighed in unison. "I thought I told you never to turn off the alarm unless-"

"Yeah, yeah I got it bird boy," Cyborg muttered clicking another button turning the screen off. "Continue?"

"…I haven't been eating because…well my birthday is coming up…"

"…"

"And well…my powers are at their peak on my birthday. So I figured that if I didn't eat…I wouldn't have enough strength to go around destroying the earth…"

"You're…kidding right? You haven't been eating because of your _birthday?_"

"I don't want to hurt any of you! I'll be fine! As long as I meditate-"

"Let's go," he murmured, taking hold of her arm.

"Where are we going?"

"Common room. We're gonna get the others' opinions on this,"

"No we can't!" Raven screeched, snatching her arm back from the metal man. Baffled, he eyed her until she muttered, "Please Cy, I am trusting _you _as my big brother. Please you can't tell anyone!"

"Rae, I have to. You can't just starve yourself-"

"Okay, fine I'll eat! Better? So now we don't have to mention this to a soul!"

"…Alright Rae," he murmured. After staring into her eyes for what felt like ages, abruptly he pulled her into an embrace. "But you have to swear you won't do this again."

"…Promise," she said hugging her large friend back.

"Good. I'm gonna go put on some dinner and you'd better be there." He said, taking his leave.

She sighed again. _So the 'starving myself' thing didn't work out. _She thought._ Now what?_

"Hey Robin," the changeling said. "…Can I tell you something?"

_**Okay so by far that was the worst chapter i've written so far...but the next one will make up for it promise!**_

_**with love,**_

_**XxflawedrainbowxX  
**_


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